After logging in, signing for the key, picking up the video and sign-in sheet, I carried a fan over with me to the faith based dorm. We meet in a room set up for teaching, but it is very poorly air conditioned - hence the fan - and the ladies hate coming in there. I do not blame them at all, but I was afraid none would show up with Linda gone. To my surprise nineteen entered with water bottles in tow and paper fans in hand.
They strategically placed themselves as close to the fan as possible, but to little avail. It was just hot. I stood behind the fan, allowing them to get all the air they could. Still we all wore red faces, sweat dripping down our necks. What did I expect? It's prison.
This group had been difficult to engage in conversation as I had been there the week before preparing for my solo lesson. So I decided to try and break the silence. I asked them to tell me one good thing about themselves - an ability, a quality, or some part of their physical appearance they liked. Often it is easier to name our downfalls and obviously with them being incarcerated, they could have talked about those, but I wanted to hear them say something redeeming about themselves.
They were stumped. Finally one girl said, "I am honest and speak my mind."
Well okay, I thought. That is not always positive, but to her it was.
The next girl said she was a good organizer. Another said she was a good listener.
And then the room fell silent. I pressed for them to continue and they just shrugged. That's when something sweet and tender began to happen. They started telling each other what they saw in them, encouraging them with such kindness.
"You are good at painting."
"You are always happy."
"You do your job really good without complaining."
Soon they picked up the trend and started naming their own strengths again.
It touched my heart just to hear them. We went on with class and the topic was victimization. This is a really hard lesson to talk about, but we did. They told me they had built walls around themselves and allowed no one in. They were honest.
I told them of God's great love for His children and that there is nothing they could ever do to hinder that. Ever. They just stared at me with unknowing faces.
They handed in their homework and as I walked to the car, I thought about the things they said about themselves and each other. I prayed that God would show them who He is in such a way that they might know His goodness and great love. Many in prison repeat their offenses and return. It is a hard cycle to break.
There is a field next to the parking lot. Most prisons are in the middle of nowhere for good reason. I always watch the horses as they graze. Today they came to see me.
Amen. So good. And praise God for the good work you are doing in there. I know those ladies are looking for any hope they can find, and may they find it in Jesus. Thanks for spreading hope to the hopeless.
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